1 00:00:05,240 --> 00:00:06,359 SHE LAUGHS 2 00:00:06,360 --> 00:00:08,319 Is that a sourdough loaf? 3 00:00:08,320 --> 00:00:10,119 GASPS Oh, my God, 4 00:00:10,120 --> 00:00:11,920 it's finally happening! 5 00:00:13,160 --> 00:00:14,599 Wow! 6 00:00:14,600 --> 00:00:16,359 Look at this. Hey. How's it going? 7 00:00:16,360 --> 00:00:17,959 It's so Nordic. 8 00:00:17,960 --> 00:00:19,879 I love all the pine. 9 00:00:19,880 --> 00:00:23,839 Mm. This smells exactly how I imagine Finland feels. 10 00:00:23,840 --> 00:00:25,679 Are you the same Vantablack as the one in Chiswick? 11 00:00:25,680 --> 00:00:27,279 Yep. That's us. Fantastic. 12 00:00:27,280 --> 00:00:28,799 We were on the same street. 13 00:00:28,800 --> 00:00:31,279 You might remember Hygge Tygge. 14 00:00:31,280 --> 00:00:32,479 Oh, yeah, is that the gift shop? 15 00:00:32,480 --> 00:00:34,079 It was a lifestyle concept shop. Store. 16 00:00:34,080 --> 00:00:36,879 But, er, yeah, I guess it was my gift to Chiswick High Road. 17 00:00:36,880 --> 00:00:40,719 God, it's so great to have a kindred spirit in the locale. 18 00:00:40,720 --> 00:00:42,599 You know, I would be happy 19 00:00:42,600 --> 00:00:44,919 to give Vantablack a pump on the socials if you like? 20 00:00:44,920 --> 00:00:48,759 I, um, run this little thang called Senuous? 21 00:00:48,760 --> 00:00:50,879 Cool. Love a local blog, yeah. 22 00:00:50,880 --> 00:00:52,039 It's not a local blog. 23 00:00:52,040 --> 00:00:53,599 Do you want a coffee? Oh! 24 00:00:53,600 --> 00:00:55,679 Gratis, as a thank you. 25 00:00:55,680 --> 00:00:59,319 I'm supposed to be fasting till 11:00, but, um... 26 00:00:59,320 --> 00:01:00,879 ...rules are made to be broken. 27 00:01:00,880 --> 00:01:01,959 Thank you! 28 00:01:01,960 --> 00:01:05,639 Also, can I just say? Big up to a fellow girl-boss. 29 00:01:05,640 --> 00:01:07,720 Yeah. Who runs the world, right? 30 00:01:08,640 --> 00:01:10,959 Jeff Bezos? I was going to say girls. 31 00:01:10,960 --> 00:01:12,159 Yeah...! 32 00:01:12,160 --> 00:01:13,199 Of course. 33 00:01:13,200 --> 00:01:14,719 No, I love a bit of J-Lo. 34 00:01:14,720 --> 00:01:16,040 There you go. 35 00:01:17,120 --> 00:01:18,159 Oh, wow! 36 00:01:18,160 --> 00:01:19,519 Is that a vulva? It's a coffee bean. 37 00:01:19,520 --> 00:01:20,879 It's a coffee bean. I love it. 38 00:01:20,880 --> 00:01:22,160 Yeah! 39 00:01:27,280 --> 00:01:28,920 I should've got a straw... 40 00:01:32,280 --> 00:01:34,559 Aww, hello. Who's this? 41 00:01:34,560 --> 00:01:35,999 Aww, this is Bobby, 42 00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:37,479 my new fur baby. Bobby! 43 00:01:37,480 --> 00:01:40,919 I was feeling a bit lonely so I went out and got meself a wolf. 44 00:01:40,920 --> 00:01:42,919 I mean, I would've started with a Jack Russell 45 00:01:42,920 --> 00:01:44,879 or something a bit smaller, like a hamster. 46 00:01:44,880 --> 00:01:46,679 Well, guys... 47 00:01:46,680 --> 00:01:48,479 She came. She saw. 48 00:01:48,480 --> 00:01:49,839 She gentrified. 49 00:01:49,840 --> 00:01:53,119 SoHa just got its first decent coffee shop. 50 00:01:53,120 --> 00:01:55,279 What about Ron's Coffee Counter? 51 00:01:55,280 --> 00:01:57,439 He thought a cortado was a make of car, Fi. 52 00:01:57,440 --> 00:02:01,399 No. Vantablack Coffee is a real boon for SoHa. 53 00:02:01,400 --> 00:02:03,599 I'm just amazed it's happened so quickly. 54 00:02:03,600 --> 00:02:06,479 As I always said, "If the Amanda can't go to the coffee, 55 00:02:06,480 --> 00:02:08,480 "the coffee must come to the Amanda." 56 00:02:09,600 --> 00:02:12,439 So modest. Yeah. It's quite funny though, yeah?! 57 00:02:12,440 --> 00:02:13,759 Bobby, no! No, Bobby! 58 00:02:13,760 --> 00:02:14,999 Oh! Sorry, sorry! 59 00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:16,199 You've got a fan there, Amanda. 60 00:02:16,200 --> 00:02:18,519 Who's this? Oh, this is Bobby! 61 00:02:18,520 --> 00:02:19,999 Ahh! In't he the cutest? 62 00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:21,159 Ahh, he's lovely! 63 00:02:21,160 --> 00:02:23,119 He slept next to me all night last night. 64 00:02:23,120 --> 00:02:24,159 Farting away. 65 00:02:24,160 --> 00:02:25,879 Made me realise how much I miss Della. 66 00:02:25,880 --> 00:02:27,559 Aww. Oh! 67 00:02:27,560 --> 00:02:29,119 Ah! Oh... Oh. 68 00:02:29,120 --> 00:02:30,759 Actually, no, thank you, Bobby. 69 00:02:30,760 --> 00:02:33,319 C'mon, Bobby - where's your ball? Bobby! Where's your ball? 70 00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:35,279 Er, I think he's found his balls, Fi. 71 00:02:35,280 --> 00:02:36,959 No... That's horrid. 72 00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:38,439 Mate! Oi! 73 00:02:38,440 --> 00:02:39,959 What you doing?! Mate! 74 00:02:39,960 --> 00:02:41,759 You can't just drive on here! 75 00:02:41,760 --> 00:02:44,439 What are you doing? Are you serious? What?! Oh, my God. 76 00:02:44,440 --> 00:02:45,799 Who does that? 77 00:02:45,800 --> 00:02:48,239 Mummy. All right, Felicity! 78 00:02:48,240 --> 00:02:49,359 What are you doing here? 79 00:02:49,360 --> 00:02:52,319 Can't a doting grandmother come to cheer on her little bear? 80 00:02:52,320 --> 00:02:53,999 Go, Georgie! 81 00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:55,599 Right. Anyone for brunch? 82 00:02:55,600 --> 00:02:57,839 No can do, I'm afraid, Mummy. 83 00:02:57,840 --> 00:03:00,039 I'm doing a bit of pro-bono for Vantablack. 84 00:03:00,040 --> 00:03:02,479 Promised I'd pop in later and do some shots for the 'gram. 85 00:03:02,480 --> 00:03:05,079 You can come with if you like, Mummy, but I will be working. 86 00:03:05,080 --> 00:03:07,559 That's very noble of you, Mands, helping out a local business. 87 00:03:07,560 --> 00:03:11,639 Well, I just think Harlesden is crying out for a community hub. 88 00:03:11,640 --> 00:03:14,839 I tell you what it's not crying out for is a £5 bloody croissant. 89 00:03:14,840 --> 00:03:17,799 "Quoi-sannn" - and you're paying for the quality. 90 00:03:17,800 --> 00:03:20,159 If you want a bog-standard pastry, there's always Greggs. 91 00:03:20,160 --> 00:03:23,079 Babe, if you come for Greggs, you come for me. 92 00:03:23,080 --> 00:03:24,879 I am not coming for Greggs. 93 00:03:24,880 --> 00:03:27,279 OK, well, I'm just saying you don't have to remortgage your flat 94 00:03:27,280 --> 00:03:28,599 for a coffee, so... 95 00:03:28,600 --> 00:03:31,039 Please don't make this a class war, Abigail. 96 00:03:31,040 --> 00:03:33,159 There's a place in SoHa for everyone. 97 00:03:33,160 --> 00:03:35,679 I'll go to Vantablacks, you can go to Greggs. 98 00:03:35,680 --> 00:03:36,719 OK. 99 00:03:36,720 --> 00:03:39,719 Who is this man Gregg and why is everyone still talking about him? 100 00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:42,079 Anyway - Fi, Mal, brunch? 101 00:03:42,080 --> 00:03:44,599 I'd love to, I've got to go and look at some sheds. Ugh! 102 00:03:44,600 --> 00:03:47,119 Tell me you're middle-aged without telling me you're middle-aged. 103 00:03:47,120 --> 00:03:48,479 No - Ned's outgrown his bunk 104 00:03:48,480 --> 00:03:50,559 and the double bed's taken up his entire room, 105 00:03:50,560 --> 00:03:52,879 so I thought we'd build the shed together over half term, 106 00:03:52,880 --> 00:03:54,199 to give him some more space. 107 00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:56,719 And where exactly is this shed going to go? 108 00:03:56,720 --> 00:03:57,999 The end of my garden. 109 00:03:58,000 --> 00:03:59,119 My garden. 110 00:03:59,120 --> 00:04:00,879 No, I'm pretty sure it's my garden. 111 00:04:00,880 --> 00:04:03,039 That's why they call it a garden flat. 112 00:04:03,040 --> 00:04:04,759 No, they call it a garden flat 113 00:04:04,760 --> 00:04:07,279 because people are too polite to say you live in my cellar. 114 00:04:07,280 --> 00:04:09,559 Um, I'm trying to get rid of an old summer house. 115 00:04:09,560 --> 00:04:12,359 You can have it for nothing if you can be bothered to take it apart. 116 00:04:12,360 --> 00:04:13,679 Ohh! Oh, happy days, yeah. 117 00:04:13,680 --> 00:04:14,839 Absolutely. Cheers. 118 00:04:14,840 --> 00:04:16,519 Well, let's make a plan after coffee. 119 00:04:16,520 --> 00:04:17,799 Nobody leave without me. 120 00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:18,919 Sounds great. 121 00:04:18,920 --> 00:04:20,079 I'll give you a hand, if you like. 122 00:04:20,080 --> 00:04:21,799 Since when have you been into DIY? 123 00:04:21,800 --> 00:04:25,479 Oh, well, it'd be nice to have some father-son-stepfather bonding time. 124 00:04:25,480 --> 00:04:27,479 And, y'know, I can learn from the master. 125 00:04:27,480 --> 00:04:28,639 HE CHUCKLES 126 00:04:28,640 --> 00:04:30,359 There's a bottle cap over there. Oh, leave off. 127 00:04:30,360 --> 00:04:32,519 Bottle cap. Yeah - and that. So unfair. 128 00:04:32,520 --> 00:04:34,599 Yeah, well, if you can't do the time, don't do the crime. 129 00:04:34,600 --> 00:04:35,879 What's going on? 130 00:04:35,880 --> 00:04:37,399 I suppose you've all heard about Anus-gate? 131 00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:39,399 What? I got a phone call from the school... 132 00:04:39,400 --> 00:04:42,199 Yes? ..to say that they caught Darius sending pictures 133 00:04:42,200 --> 00:04:44,400 of his bumhole on Snapchat. 134 00:04:45,440 --> 00:04:46,759 Oh! GASPS 135 00:04:46,760 --> 00:04:47,799 Gross. 136 00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:49,519 It's only a photo of my clenched fist! 137 00:04:49,520 --> 00:04:52,079 Yes! Which looks remarkably like your chocolate starfish. 138 00:04:52,080 --> 00:04:54,439 You know, this could very easily have gone viral. 139 00:04:54,440 --> 00:04:56,719 So, I've taken things into my own hands. 140 00:04:56,720 --> 00:04:57,919 Have a look, 141 00:04:57,920 --> 00:05:00,279 and feel free to share the results with your teens. 142 00:05:00,280 --> 00:05:03,999 "Please repost to show my eejit son how fast things spread online." 143 00:05:04,000 --> 00:05:06,159 Please don't tell me you've posted that. 144 00:05:06,160 --> 00:05:07,439 Yes, I have - I posted it this morning, 145 00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:09,359 and I've already gotten 140 shares. 146 00:05:09,360 --> 00:05:10,559 That's even more embarrassing 147 00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:12,279 than posting a picture of my actual bumhole. 148 00:05:12,280 --> 00:05:13,399 Yeah, well. 149 00:05:13,400 --> 00:05:15,639 Maybe you'll think twice now about sending another picture. 150 00:05:15,640 --> 00:05:17,239 Oh, yeah! 151 00:05:17,240 --> 00:05:19,519 Yeah, it does look like an anus! LAUGHTER 152 00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:21,799 Oh, gosh. Anne, I'm so sorry. 153 00:05:21,800 --> 00:05:23,160 Get that lid. 154 00:05:31,040 --> 00:05:32,079 What have you seen? 155 00:05:32,080 --> 00:05:34,319 Nothing, Mummy. I'm posing for the camera. 156 00:05:34,320 --> 00:05:35,919 CAMERA SHUTTER Did you get it? 157 00:05:35,920 --> 00:05:36,999 Yep. OK, right. 158 00:05:37,000 --> 00:05:38,079 I'm going to do one with this 159 00:05:38,080 --> 00:05:39,840 and swap seats for a different background. 160 00:05:41,240 --> 00:05:42,680 Keep the camera up, Manus. 161 00:05:46,240 --> 00:05:48,559 So you post a picture of yourself eating cakes, 162 00:05:48,560 --> 00:05:49,999 and that's a job? 163 00:05:50,000 --> 00:05:52,759 No, I'm going to edit it together into a montage, 164 00:05:52,760 --> 00:05:55,799 under the hashtag "Let SoHa eat cake". 165 00:05:55,800 --> 00:05:57,639 Vive la revolution. 166 00:05:57,640 --> 00:05:59,959 Can I have some of these if you're not going to eat them? 167 00:05:59,960 --> 00:06:01,519 No, Manus. We're going to the dentist at two. 168 00:06:01,520 --> 00:06:02,799 Actually we need to bust a move. 169 00:06:02,800 --> 00:06:04,359 Oh, so soon? Shall I come with? 170 00:06:04,360 --> 00:06:07,479 Mummy, we're going to the dentist! Just stay and enjoy your coffee. 171 00:06:07,480 --> 00:06:11,439 OK, so we have a latte for Felicity, 172 00:06:11,440 --> 00:06:14,719 and a turmeric and ginger power shot to go. Thank you! 173 00:06:14,720 --> 00:06:16,159 Mmm. 174 00:06:16,160 --> 00:06:17,199 Hoh! 175 00:06:17,200 --> 00:06:19,199 Ellie, babe - these cakes are going to look amazing 176 00:06:19,200 --> 00:06:20,319 on the socials. 177 00:06:20,320 --> 00:06:24,439 I'll pop in later to give you a sneaky peak before it goes viral. 178 00:06:24,440 --> 00:06:25,480 Amanda! 179 00:06:27,200 --> 00:06:28,519 It's a coffee bean, Mummy. 180 00:06:28,520 --> 00:06:29,639 Just give it a stir. 181 00:06:29,640 --> 00:06:31,000 Right, Manus, let's ride! 182 00:06:35,880 --> 00:06:37,160 Do you do wine? 183 00:06:40,120 --> 00:06:41,559 March 2022. 184 00:06:41,560 --> 00:06:42,679 Bin it. 185 00:06:42,680 --> 00:06:44,799 Ugh. It's bad enough that I'm grounded - 186 00:06:44,800 --> 00:06:46,359 now you're making me do this? 187 00:06:46,360 --> 00:06:48,759 I'm sorry but you're getting no sympathy from me, Darius. 188 00:06:48,760 --> 00:06:50,039 If you hadn't... Ah, Jesus! 189 00:06:50,040 --> 00:06:51,639 A mouse has gotten into me pankos. 190 00:06:51,640 --> 00:06:53,639 I only showed the picture to a couple of mates, 191 00:06:53,640 --> 00:06:55,079 and it weren't even my real bumhole. 192 00:06:55,080 --> 00:06:56,919 Yeah, well, you're going to have to learn the hard way, aren't ya? 193 00:06:56,920 --> 00:07:01,520 Pfft. Speaking of which - it's time we saw how our pot plant was going. 194 00:07:03,560 --> 00:07:05,039 Bloody hell! 195 00:07:05,040 --> 00:07:06,199 Oi, oi, oi! 196 00:07:06,200 --> 00:07:08,839 All right. Watch your language. OK. 197 00:07:08,840 --> 00:07:10,280 Shit the fucking bed. 198 00:07:11,360 --> 00:07:13,239 That's been retweeted 40,000 times. 199 00:07:13,240 --> 00:07:15,799 And there's 296 comments. 200 00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:18,759 "How do you get your peace lily looking so healthy?" 201 00:07:18,760 --> 00:07:20,999 "Do you water it every day?" 202 00:07:21,000 --> 00:07:22,959 God! 203 00:07:22,960 --> 00:07:25,239 I've never been so popular. 204 00:07:25,240 --> 00:07:27,079 I'm going to have to reply to these. 205 00:07:27,080 --> 00:07:29,079 Keep going with the cleaning, Darius! 206 00:07:29,080 --> 00:07:30,560 You're still on probation. 207 00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:33,879 Right. Let's get the other door off. 208 00:07:33,880 --> 00:07:37,479 So, we go lefty-loosey, righty-tighty. 209 00:07:37,480 --> 00:07:38,839 Oh, that's good. Yeah. 210 00:07:38,840 --> 00:07:40,199 Wait, did you come up with that? 211 00:07:40,200 --> 00:07:42,999 No. My grandad taught it to my dad, and he taught it to me. 212 00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:45,039 Now I'm teaching it to Ned. Oh! 213 00:07:45,040 --> 00:07:47,199 Right, so if you want to start on the left side, 214 00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:49,079 me and Ned'll do the right. 215 00:07:49,080 --> 00:07:51,439 Give us a shout if you need a hand. 216 00:07:51,440 --> 00:07:53,799 I'd have killed for a shed like this when I was a teenager. 217 00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:56,759 Somewhere to chill, some Magic FM, 218 00:07:56,760 --> 00:07:58,519 set up the Warhammer... 219 00:07:58,520 --> 00:08:01,239 Hm! How were we married to the same woman? 220 00:08:01,240 --> 00:08:02,759 What is that? 221 00:08:02,760 --> 00:08:05,119 Oh, this? It is an impact driver. 222 00:08:05,120 --> 00:08:06,519 I didn't know you were into DIY. 223 00:08:06,520 --> 00:08:07,639 Oh, I'm not, really, 224 00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:11,519 but it was on sale and I can't resist a "Which?" Best Buy. 225 00:08:11,520 --> 00:08:14,079 Do you want a go? Oh, no, I'm good with the screwdriver. 226 00:08:14,080 --> 00:08:16,039 I got this kit when my grandad died. 227 00:08:16,040 --> 00:08:17,519 Right, you watching this, Ned? 228 00:08:17,520 --> 00:08:19,359 You just line this up straight with... 229 00:08:19,360 --> 00:08:20,679 WHIRRING Can't we just use JJ's drill thingy? 230 00:08:20,680 --> 00:08:21,759 It looks way quicker. 231 00:08:21,760 --> 00:08:23,199 Can't you just concentrate? 232 00:08:23,200 --> 00:08:24,279 What? 233 00:08:24,280 --> 00:08:26,559 Left side done. See? 234 00:08:26,560 --> 00:08:27,759 Wow. 235 00:08:27,760 --> 00:08:29,719 Want me to start on the inside whilst I wait? 236 00:08:29,720 --> 00:08:31,439 Oh, boys! 237 00:08:31,440 --> 00:08:33,079 I brought you some home-made lemonade. 238 00:08:33,080 --> 00:08:34,159 Nice. 239 00:08:34,160 --> 00:08:35,399 Rather fancy! 240 00:08:35,400 --> 00:08:38,599 Thanks. Oh, it's just a little something I rustled up. 241 00:08:38,600 --> 00:08:39,999 This is Sprite. 242 00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:41,399 Mmm. 243 00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:43,559 Um, are you sure you want to get rid of this? 244 00:08:43,560 --> 00:08:44,799 It's in really good nick. 245 00:08:44,800 --> 00:08:46,039 Oh, no, take it. 246 00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:48,559 I just used it for the occasional soiree in the garden 247 00:08:48,560 --> 00:08:49,799 during lockdown. 248 00:08:49,800 --> 00:08:51,719 But most of my friends have sadly left us. 249 00:08:51,720 --> 00:08:53,279 Oh, no, that's awful. I'm sorry. 250 00:08:53,280 --> 00:08:54,639 No, they didn't die. 251 00:08:54,640 --> 00:08:57,320 They just moved to the Cayman Islands when Labour got in. 252 00:08:59,040 --> 00:09:00,799 Oh. WHIRRING 253 00:09:00,800 --> 00:09:03,559 Um, don't feel like you have to wait out here in the cold with us. 254 00:09:03,560 --> 00:09:05,079 No, it's fine. 255 00:09:05,080 --> 00:09:07,079 I love watching men at work. 256 00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:08,799 Heads! 257 00:09:08,800 --> 00:09:10,359 Oh! Whoa! 258 00:09:10,360 --> 00:09:11,759 That's the front done. 259 00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:13,200 What next? 260 00:09:14,240 --> 00:09:15,680 WHIRRING 261 00:09:23,280 --> 00:09:25,439 Ellie, babe. We're out of Aesop in the loo. 262 00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:27,479 Oh, cheers. Did you want another coffee? 263 00:09:27,480 --> 00:09:28,719 Yes, please. 264 00:09:28,720 --> 00:09:31,239 Although I am very tempted by your matcha. 265 00:09:31,240 --> 00:09:32,279 Matcha comin' atcha. 266 00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:33,439 Oh, that's good. 267 00:09:33,440 --> 00:09:35,639 You've got to put that on the chalk board, Ellie. 268 00:09:35,640 --> 00:09:37,159 PHONE VIBRATES 269 00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:39,919 Oh, God, give me a break. 270 00:09:39,920 --> 00:09:41,199 That your boss? 271 00:09:41,200 --> 00:09:43,319 Oh, no. That's just the guy I collab with. 272 00:09:43,320 --> 00:09:44,519 My co-collaber. 273 00:09:44,520 --> 00:09:46,519 No, I'm a digital nomad. 274 00:09:46,520 --> 00:09:50,959 To paraphrase the song - wherever I lay my laptop, that's my office. 275 00:09:50,960 --> 00:09:52,639 I'll leave you to it, then. Yeah, if you don't mind, 276 00:09:52,640 --> 00:09:54,920 cos I've actually got a huge deadline so... 277 00:09:56,200 --> 00:09:58,400 SHE SIGHS LOUDLY 278 00:10:00,840 --> 00:10:02,280 SHE CLEARS THROAT 279 00:10:05,800 --> 00:10:08,399 Oh, by the way, my, er, latest post on the cafe 280 00:10:08,400 --> 00:10:10,199 got a lot of traction yesterday, 281 00:10:10,200 --> 00:10:11,959 so expect a bit of a flurry. 282 00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:13,839 Great, cos we've just had these in. 283 00:10:13,840 --> 00:10:14,999 Oh, yeah? 284 00:10:15,000 --> 00:10:17,079 Oh, wow! 285 00:10:17,080 --> 00:10:18,959 Hello! What's this? 286 00:10:18,960 --> 00:10:20,759 It's a "macaronut". 287 00:10:20,760 --> 00:10:22,159 A macaroni doughnut? 288 00:10:22,160 --> 00:10:23,960 No, no, it's a macaron and a doughnut. 289 00:10:25,480 --> 00:10:26,799 That makes more sense. 290 00:10:26,800 --> 00:10:28,679 Yeah. Sorry... 291 00:10:28,680 --> 00:10:31,559 I do need to concentrate, so if you could just... 292 00:10:31,560 --> 00:10:33,039 Thank you. 293 00:10:33,040 --> 00:10:35,839 LAUGHTER AND CHATTER OUTSIDE 294 00:10:35,840 --> 00:10:37,359 All right, love! Hello, how are you?! 295 00:10:37,360 --> 00:10:39,959 This is my new furbaby! Fi! 296 00:10:39,960 --> 00:10:41,199 Hello! 297 00:10:41,200 --> 00:10:43,719 Oh, my God! That's my good friend Fi. 298 00:10:43,720 --> 00:10:45,879 You know Della Fry, the chef? That's her wife. 299 00:10:45,880 --> 00:10:47,199 She's a lesbian. 300 00:10:47,200 --> 00:10:49,159 Fi! You coming for a coffee? 301 00:10:49,160 --> 00:10:50,319 Hey, Mands. 302 00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:52,759 I was just about to go and meet my, er, dog walking pals... 303 00:10:52,760 --> 00:10:54,239 Get in here! Come on. 304 00:10:54,240 --> 00:10:56,879 You've got to try one of these insane matchas. 305 00:10:56,880 --> 00:10:58,519 BOBBY WHINES Oh, my goodness, Bobby! Er... 306 00:10:58,520 --> 00:10:59,839 Welcome! 307 00:10:59,840 --> 00:11:02,799 Oh, my God! Yeah! I know! It's great, isn't it? Yeah. 308 00:11:02,800 --> 00:11:04,239 No, I'm really pleased with it. 309 00:11:04,240 --> 00:11:05,719 Oh, yeah! Now, Fi. Yep? 310 00:11:05,720 --> 00:11:07,919 Let me get a shot of you for the 'gram with a macaronut. 311 00:11:07,920 --> 00:11:10,239 Yeah. Oh, a macaroni doughnut? 312 00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:12,679 No, it's a macaron and a doughnut, Fi. 313 00:11:12,680 --> 00:11:14,799 Oh! Obviously. FI LAUGHS 314 00:11:14,800 --> 00:11:16,239 That's OK. 315 00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:17,279 Oops, sorry! 316 00:11:17,280 --> 00:11:18,919 Yeah, here we go. 317 00:11:18,920 --> 00:11:20,759 Really? That face? 318 00:11:20,760 --> 00:11:22,919 Yeah. OK, no, no, it's fun. CAMERA SHUTTER 319 00:11:22,920 --> 00:11:24,159 Oh, yes! 320 00:11:24,160 --> 00:11:26,839 Right. I'm just going to upload that to the socials... 321 00:11:26,840 --> 00:11:28,279 Hello! 322 00:11:28,280 --> 00:11:31,479 I thought I'd do a quick video about how I care for my peace lily. 323 00:11:31,480 --> 00:11:33,079 That sounds just like Anne. 324 00:11:33,080 --> 00:11:34,719 It is Anne. That's her wedding ring. 325 00:11:34,720 --> 00:11:37,359 ...doing well... And I'm sure that's her bedroom. 326 00:11:37,360 --> 00:11:40,639 First every day I check for dry dead leaves. What's going on? 327 00:11:40,640 --> 00:11:42,479 Oh, my God, is this the Irish lady with the plants? 328 00:11:42,480 --> 00:11:44,839 I mean, good for her for having a go, but... 329 00:11:44,840 --> 00:11:47,559 ...please, Anne, come on - LEAVE it to the professionals. 330 00:11:47,560 --> 00:11:48,719 SHE LAUGHS 331 00:11:48,720 --> 00:11:50,039 That's so embarrassing. 332 00:11:50,040 --> 00:11:52,479 This one's got over a million views! 333 00:11:52,480 --> 00:11:53,679 Yeah, right. 334 00:11:53,680 --> 00:11:55,319 No, it does. It's over a million. 335 00:11:55,320 --> 00:11:56,959 What? Yeah. 336 00:11:56,960 --> 00:11:58,599 People love her. 337 00:11:58,600 --> 00:12:00,159 How's that got a million views? 338 00:12:00,160 --> 00:12:02,159 It's just some little fat hands and a plant. 339 00:12:02,160 --> 00:12:05,079 Has she done any more? Yeah, look - this one. 340 00:12:05,080 --> 00:12:08,359 It's got over four mil - and she only posted it last night. 341 00:12:08,360 --> 00:12:09,759 Wow! 342 00:12:09,760 --> 00:12:12,959 Anne's the new "Charlie bit my finger"! 343 00:12:12,960 --> 00:12:14,720 That's crazy! 344 00:12:17,080 --> 00:12:18,640 Oh, God, Bobby. 345 00:12:21,240 --> 00:12:23,239 Right, let's get this thing built. 346 00:12:23,240 --> 00:12:24,999 So, you just grip it at the end, 347 00:12:25,000 --> 00:12:27,319 and give it a nice controlled swing like so. 348 00:12:27,320 --> 00:12:29,319 Coo-ee! It's only me. 349 00:12:29,320 --> 00:12:30,479 Oh, God. 350 00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:31,719 Georgie let me in. 351 00:12:31,720 --> 00:12:33,639 You left this little box of bits behind, 352 00:12:33,640 --> 00:12:35,480 and I thought it might be important. 353 00:12:36,720 --> 00:12:39,319 You really didn't have to come all this way, you know, Felicity. 354 00:12:39,320 --> 00:12:41,320 Just checking in on my favourite workmen. 355 00:12:42,240 --> 00:12:43,519 As you were. 356 00:12:43,520 --> 00:12:45,119 Ah! There we are. 357 00:12:45,120 --> 00:12:46,959 All right, er, so, remember, Ned, 358 00:12:46,960 --> 00:12:49,639 you hold the hammer at the bottom of the handle, 359 00:12:49,640 --> 00:12:51,919 and you just let gravity do the work. 360 00:12:51,920 --> 00:12:53,279 Oi, JJ - is that a nail gun? 361 00:12:53,280 --> 00:12:54,559 Er, yeah. 362 00:12:54,560 --> 00:12:57,439 I saw it in Screwfix, so I thought, "Treat yourself." 363 00:12:57,440 --> 00:12:59,879 We have very different definitions of "treats". 364 00:12:59,880 --> 00:13:01,999 Can I have a go? No! Come on! 365 00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:04,879 What? This is what woodwork is all about. This. 366 00:13:04,880 --> 00:13:07,119 Not these fancy guns and tools. 367 00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:09,279 Sorry. All right - concentrate. 368 00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:10,600 OK, here we go. 369 00:13:11,680 --> 00:13:13,360 NAIL GUN PUMPS 370 00:13:15,440 --> 00:13:16,799 BANG Argh! 371 00:13:16,800 --> 00:13:18,359 Ooh! Are you OK, mate? 372 00:13:18,360 --> 00:13:19,799 I've got a first aid kit in the car. 373 00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:20,959 No, I'm all right. 374 00:13:20,960 --> 00:13:22,960 OK. Just need to not breathe for a bit. 375 00:13:29,080 --> 00:13:30,719 Amanda! Hey, Anne. 376 00:13:30,720 --> 00:13:31,839 Are you OK? 377 00:13:31,840 --> 00:13:35,159 Yeah, I just feel like we haven't connected in ages, 378 00:13:35,160 --> 00:13:36,719 and I was just passing. 379 00:13:36,720 --> 00:13:37,799 I'm just putting the twins to bed. 380 00:13:37,800 --> 00:13:40,040 Oh, that's OK. Just stick 'em in front of a Bluey. 381 00:13:41,080 --> 00:13:43,080 The cartoon. The cartoon... 382 00:13:44,680 --> 00:13:46,319 Oh, God. 383 00:13:46,320 --> 00:13:49,279 Really sweet and shabby... Yeah. ..and grubby and... 384 00:13:49,280 --> 00:13:50,839 Oh! 385 00:13:50,840 --> 00:13:51,880 SHE LAUGHS 386 00:13:53,040 --> 00:13:55,519 I know bed times are hard, Anne, but that's a bit drastic! 387 00:13:55,520 --> 00:13:56,799 SHE LAUGHS 388 00:13:56,800 --> 00:13:59,079 I just got sent it out of the blue by some company. 389 00:13:59,080 --> 00:14:01,079 They make their own cucumber and aloe gin. 390 00:14:01,080 --> 00:14:02,599 Sounds like a shower gel. 391 00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:04,079 Why are they sending it to you? 392 00:14:04,080 --> 00:14:06,159 Oh, well, they saw an Insta film I made 393 00:14:06,160 --> 00:14:09,319 about an aloe plant that I rescued from the clearance shelf in BandQ, 394 00:14:09,320 --> 00:14:10,959 and, er, they thought I'd like it. 395 00:14:10,960 --> 00:14:12,919 That's just stupid. 396 00:14:12,920 --> 00:14:15,279 I-Is that not that how Senuous works? 397 00:14:15,280 --> 00:14:18,039 Like that time you got sent, er, four boxes of mouthwash? 398 00:14:18,040 --> 00:14:20,279 No, that's totally different, Anne. Oh. 399 00:14:20,280 --> 00:14:21,719 Now, listen, 400 00:14:21,720 --> 00:14:25,079 I've been working as an influencer for quite some time now 401 00:14:25,080 --> 00:14:26,759 and do you know what I don't have? 402 00:14:26,760 --> 00:14:28,559 Followers? No, Anne. 403 00:14:28,560 --> 00:14:29,719 A mentee. 404 00:14:29,720 --> 00:14:31,559 I'm a mentor without a mentee, 405 00:14:31,560 --> 00:14:34,359 and I think you might just be that mentee, for me. 406 00:14:34,360 --> 00:14:35,759 Oh, um... 407 00:14:35,760 --> 00:14:38,319 Now, you've got to undo all those bad habits you've picked up. 408 00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:39,919 Back to basics. 409 00:14:39,920 --> 00:14:42,439 Make-up. Oh, but it's only my hands that are in shot. 410 00:14:42,440 --> 00:14:44,159 I usually do my posts first thing, 411 00:14:44,160 --> 00:14:46,719 so, most of the time I'm just straight out of the shower...! 412 00:14:46,720 --> 00:14:48,999 Anne, creating content isn't just a hobby - 413 00:14:49,000 --> 00:14:51,399 it's a way of life. Mm, mm. OK? 414 00:14:51,400 --> 00:14:53,839 I think you need to be a bit more respectful of my culture. 415 00:14:53,840 --> 00:14:55,799 Um... 416 00:14:55,800 --> 00:14:58,079 My apologies to your people. 417 00:14:58,080 --> 00:14:59,719 Mm-hm. Yeah. Yeah. 418 00:14:59,720 --> 00:15:01,160 Come on! 419 00:15:03,440 --> 00:15:05,359 I just love plants. 420 00:15:05,360 --> 00:15:07,839 Nature really gets me in the feels, you know? 421 00:15:07,840 --> 00:15:10,199 Yes, you can't beat a bit of green fingering. 422 00:15:10,200 --> 00:15:11,399 Watch this. 423 00:15:11,400 --> 00:15:13,399 And just to add, if you're vibing with this, 424 00:15:13,400 --> 00:15:15,920 then like and subscribe to Senuous for more inspiring content. 425 00:15:17,160 --> 00:15:20,119 Oh, wow! Meghan Markle eat your heart out. 426 00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:21,399 You think? So good. 427 00:15:21,400 --> 00:15:24,519 It's so good! It's quite a departure from my usual posts. 428 00:15:24,520 --> 00:15:27,359 Anne, this will have boosted your viewing figures no end. 429 00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:31,439 Well, um, according to the analytics they've actually dropped off a bit. 430 00:15:31,440 --> 00:15:32,919 Let me see. 431 00:15:32,920 --> 00:15:37,039 That's about 70,000 less than my previous three posts. 432 00:15:37,040 --> 00:15:38,879 Oh, well. Anne, that's just numbers. 433 00:15:38,880 --> 00:15:40,679 Rome wasn't built in a day. 434 00:15:40,680 --> 00:15:42,719 OK. That's the problem with the new gen of influencers. 435 00:15:42,720 --> 00:15:44,279 They expect overnight success. 436 00:15:44,280 --> 00:15:46,959 Mmm. I think you should just go back to doing that, Anne, love. 437 00:15:46,960 --> 00:15:49,199 Honestly. No offence, Mands. 438 00:15:49,200 --> 00:15:52,599 Abigail, with the greatest respect, this is my forte, 439 00:15:52,600 --> 00:15:55,239 and I'm imparting my extensive expertise for free 440 00:15:55,240 --> 00:15:57,279 to my friend who's struggling. 441 00:15:57,280 --> 00:16:00,719 So, you just stick to the... 442 00:16:00,720 --> 00:16:02,320 Running a food bank. 443 00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:06,319 Please stop virtue-signalling. It's just... 444 00:16:06,320 --> 00:16:07,679 SHE LAUGHS 445 00:16:07,680 --> 00:16:09,119 I gave you guys £3,000, 446 00:16:09,120 --> 00:16:11,720 you don't hear me shoehorning it into every conversation. 447 00:16:16,120 --> 00:16:19,160 She literally gave me a seven-foot cheque. 448 00:16:24,640 --> 00:16:28,959 Oh! Jeez Louise, it's cold out there. 449 00:16:28,960 --> 00:16:31,559 It's all right for you. You ain't got to go out in bleedin' shorts. 450 00:16:31,560 --> 00:16:32,879 Should've brought my thermals. 451 00:16:32,880 --> 00:16:34,599 Oh, God, Bobby. 452 00:16:34,600 --> 00:16:36,400 Ugh! PHONE VIBRATES 453 00:16:37,520 --> 00:16:39,799 Ugh... Is your mum all right, Amanda? 454 00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:41,039 Yeah, she's fine. 455 00:16:41,040 --> 00:16:42,679 I mean, she never really got over John Lewis 456 00:16:42,680 --> 00:16:45,879 reducing their loyalty points, but otherwise she's all right. 457 00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:47,359 She's constantly in my garden. 458 00:16:47,360 --> 00:16:48,439 My garden. 459 00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:49,839 Do you think she might be a bit lonely? 460 00:16:49,840 --> 00:16:52,279 Lonely? My mother? Yeah. 461 00:16:52,280 --> 00:16:54,279 Please. 462 00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:56,399 She should get a dog if she's lonely. 463 00:16:56,400 --> 00:16:59,319 No, Fi! I was lonely without Dells, then I got a dog, 464 00:16:59,320 --> 00:17:03,279 and I met loads of new dog-walking pals, and I'm no longer lonely. 465 00:17:03,280 --> 00:17:05,439 Fi, that makes you sound really lonely. 466 00:17:05,440 --> 00:17:08,479 Guys, my mother's not lonely. 467 00:17:08,480 --> 00:17:10,799 Honestly, she's got a more active social life than I do. 468 00:17:10,800 --> 00:17:13,799 She's basically brunching her way through my inheritance. 469 00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:15,439 Don't you worry about her. 470 00:17:15,440 --> 00:17:17,679 Then why is she currently sat on my front step 471 00:17:17,680 --> 00:17:20,319 waiting for me to let her in like a stray cat? 472 00:17:20,320 --> 00:17:22,319 It's freezing out there. 473 00:17:22,320 --> 00:17:23,959 Fine. I'll have a word. 474 00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:25,719 Thank you. 475 00:17:25,720 --> 00:17:28,119 Oh, look, it's Pippa's mummy! 476 00:17:28,120 --> 00:17:31,159 Maggie! Look who I'm with! 477 00:17:31,160 --> 00:17:34,519 Who's this? She is a massive, massive fan of yours. 478 00:17:34,520 --> 00:17:37,159 Oh! Yeah! Come and look at this. 479 00:17:37,160 --> 00:17:39,319 Come on, Pippa! Here we go. 480 00:17:39,320 --> 00:17:41,359 Are you the lady from Insta? 481 00:17:41,360 --> 00:17:43,639 Guilty as charged. THEY LAUGH 482 00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:47,959 My fiddle-leaf tree has never looked so healthy. 483 00:17:47,960 --> 00:17:49,599 I love your accent, by the way. 484 00:17:49,600 --> 00:17:50,799 Oh, thank you. 485 00:17:50,800 --> 00:17:52,879 Oh, wait, wait, we have to Facetime my friend Sarah. 486 00:17:52,880 --> 00:17:54,719 She loves you too! Yeah! 487 00:17:54,720 --> 00:17:56,479 You're a proper celeb now, Anne! CALL CONNECTING 488 00:17:56,480 --> 00:17:59,039 Hi - you're not going to believe who I'm with! 489 00:17:59,040 --> 00:18:00,959 Oh, my God! Is that who I think it is?! 490 00:18:00,960 --> 00:18:02,479 Fi, what is going on with your dog? 491 00:18:02,480 --> 00:18:05,239 Every time it sees me it does that. 492 00:18:05,240 --> 00:18:06,839 You think? Yes. 493 00:18:06,840 --> 00:18:08,559 Your dog clearly fancies me. 494 00:18:08,560 --> 00:18:09,879 But it might be worms, Mand. 495 00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:11,319 It's not worms, Fi. 496 00:18:11,320 --> 00:18:13,199 I've seen this before. 497 00:18:13,200 --> 00:18:16,519 Albeit on human men, but it's definitely a thing. 498 00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:18,999 Oh, my God, can you say begonia? "Bergonia". 499 00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:21,080 MAGGIE SQUEALS 500 00:18:24,760 --> 00:18:26,399 Hey, girl! 501 00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:28,519 Busy today, I see. Hmm. 502 00:18:28,520 --> 00:18:30,039 My posts must be kicking in. 503 00:18:30,040 --> 00:18:31,719 I'll get the usual. Sure. 504 00:18:31,720 --> 00:18:35,439 And... an almond croissant. 505 00:18:35,440 --> 00:18:37,359 I shouldn't-couldn't-wouldn't, but... 506 00:18:37,360 --> 00:18:39,519 You know what? I'll actually get a couple of extra for the kids. 507 00:18:39,520 --> 00:18:41,399 Sure. Just while I've got you, 508 00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:42,679 did you want to settle up your tab? 509 00:18:42,680 --> 00:18:44,719 I just thought, cos it's coming up towards the end of the week... 510 00:18:44,720 --> 00:18:45,999 AMANDA LAUGHS 511 00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:47,679 That's good. A tab. 512 00:18:47,680 --> 00:18:49,479 SHE SCOFFS 513 00:18:49,480 --> 00:18:51,160 RECEIPT PRINTS Oh you're not joking. 514 00:18:52,600 --> 00:18:54,079 There you go. 515 00:18:54,080 --> 00:18:56,319 This is £270. 516 00:18:56,320 --> 00:18:58,959 Hmm? You said my drinks were gratis. 517 00:18:58,960 --> 00:19:00,759 I said the first coffee was gratis. 518 00:19:00,760 --> 00:19:03,999 Yeah, "gratissss". 519 00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:06,759 Ssss. Plural. 520 00:19:06,760 --> 00:19:09,799 You can see why I thought it was more than one. 521 00:19:09,800 --> 00:19:11,479 Er, not really. 522 00:19:11,480 --> 00:19:13,559 It is the plural of the Latin word "gratia", 523 00:19:13,560 --> 00:19:16,239 but in English it functions in an invariable form. 524 00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:17,879 Don't patronise me, sweetheart. 525 00:19:17,880 --> 00:19:19,839 I'm not - I did a classics degree. 526 00:19:19,840 --> 00:19:22,999 You want to talk Latin, let's talk Latin, OK? 527 00:19:23,000 --> 00:19:25,119 Prid quo pro, Ellie. 528 00:19:25,120 --> 00:19:28,279 I have been doing a lot of work for you on the socials. 529 00:19:28,280 --> 00:19:30,279 Do you have any idea how much word of mouth 530 00:19:30,280 --> 00:19:32,279 I've generated for you, my love? 531 00:19:32,280 --> 00:19:36,239 Well, clearly not enough, because you're our only customer. Oh! 532 00:19:36,240 --> 00:19:38,519 Low blow, Ellie. Low blow. 533 00:19:38,520 --> 00:19:39,999 No need to make this personal. 534 00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:41,719 It's the opposite of making it personal, Amanda. 535 00:19:41,720 --> 00:19:42,999 I'm trying to run a business. 536 00:19:43,000 --> 00:19:45,639 Well, maybe if you didn't charge £4.50 for a coffee 537 00:19:45,640 --> 00:19:47,960 with a vagina on top. It's a coffee bean. 538 00:19:49,200 --> 00:19:51,599 That's for today's drink, and you're not getting a penny more. 539 00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:53,920 And I'm taking a scone, gratia. 540 00:19:57,120 --> 00:19:58,800 That's going on your tab! 541 00:20:01,040 --> 00:20:04,239 All right, so the secret is to tidy as you go. 542 00:20:04,240 --> 00:20:05,719 So, grab the broom. 543 00:20:05,720 --> 00:20:06,959 That's going to take ages. 544 00:20:06,960 --> 00:20:08,079 Thank you, Felicity. 545 00:20:08,080 --> 00:20:09,959 If you could just leave us to it. 546 00:20:09,960 --> 00:20:11,319 There you are! 547 00:20:11,320 --> 00:20:12,479 Oh, look - Amanda's home. 548 00:20:12,480 --> 00:20:14,399 Maybe you want to hang out in her flat, Felicity. 549 00:20:14,400 --> 00:20:15,839 No, I'm fine. 550 00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:18,399 Er...! You are not going to believe what just happened to me. 551 00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:20,559 Did someone just guess your real age? No, Mal. 552 00:20:20,560 --> 00:20:22,079 The woman in Vantablack Coffee - 553 00:20:22,080 --> 00:20:25,959 she just asked me to pay for every single item I've consumed this week. 554 00:20:25,960 --> 00:20:27,919 Only you would be shocked by that. 555 00:20:27,920 --> 00:20:30,039 Well, there's no such thing as a free lunch, darling. 556 00:20:30,040 --> 00:20:31,679 There's no such thing as a free shed. 557 00:20:31,680 --> 00:20:33,240 Do you know what? Forget it. 558 00:20:34,280 --> 00:20:36,399 Er, Amanda? Can you, erm...? 559 00:20:36,400 --> 00:20:38,800 Not now, Mal. I am enraged. 560 00:20:40,080 --> 00:20:41,400 WHIRRING 561 00:20:42,920 --> 00:20:45,439 Yo, JJ! That looks way more fun! 562 00:20:45,440 --> 00:20:46,479 Let me have a go. 563 00:20:46,480 --> 00:20:48,079 You know what? 564 00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:49,519 I give up. 565 00:20:49,520 --> 00:20:51,359 I don't know why I bother. 566 00:20:51,360 --> 00:20:53,320 Is he...? Is he all right? 567 00:20:55,040 --> 00:20:57,279 Mal, you in here? 568 00:20:57,280 --> 00:20:58,679 You all right, mate? 569 00:20:58,680 --> 00:20:59,999 Yeah, I'm fine. 570 00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:01,479 Cool, it's just... 571 00:21:01,480 --> 00:21:03,240 ...that's a lot of sriracha. 572 00:21:05,040 --> 00:21:06,479 HE SIGHS 573 00:21:06,480 --> 00:21:08,239 I know it's stupid, 574 00:21:08,240 --> 00:21:10,559 but all of those lessons my dad taught me, 575 00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:13,079 like how to chisel and use a screwdriver - 576 00:21:13,080 --> 00:21:15,199 kids these days just don't need to know that. 577 00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:17,519 Like using an A to Z or the Yellow Pages. 578 00:21:17,520 --> 00:21:20,399 It's just... useless information. 579 00:21:20,400 --> 00:21:21,959 You're spending time with him, 580 00:21:21,960 --> 00:21:24,039 showing him how to solve problems. 581 00:21:24,040 --> 00:21:26,399 My dad spent years teaching me how to code. 582 00:21:26,400 --> 00:21:28,439 Nobody needs to learn how to code any more. 583 00:21:28,440 --> 00:21:30,799 AI can do it in, like, a nanosecond. 584 00:21:30,800 --> 00:21:34,680 Hmm. But I'm still glad I spent time with him. Yeah? 585 00:21:37,280 --> 00:21:39,879 Yeah, I should probably apologise to him, eh? Yeah. 586 00:21:39,880 --> 00:21:41,879 And then, um... 587 00:21:41,880 --> 00:21:43,759 ...do you want to have a go on my nail gun? 588 00:21:43,760 --> 00:21:44,799 Fuck yeah. 589 00:21:44,800 --> 00:21:46,120 JJ LAUGHS 590 00:21:48,680 --> 00:21:49,959 Mm... 591 00:21:49,960 --> 00:21:51,679 Oh, OK, let me get some water... 592 00:21:51,680 --> 00:21:54,600 It's burning! Agh, it's burning. Mm! 593 00:22:10,160 --> 00:22:12,159 Hi, Amanda. What's this? 594 00:22:12,160 --> 00:22:15,319 Sorry, but you gave me no choice but to name and shame. 595 00:22:15,320 --> 00:22:17,439 That's illegal. Do you know what else is illegal? 596 00:22:17,440 --> 00:22:18,639 Not paying your bill. 597 00:22:18,640 --> 00:22:19,919 Take it down. 598 00:22:19,920 --> 00:22:21,239 No. Not until you've paid. 599 00:22:21,240 --> 00:22:22,799 Ellie, are you...?! 600 00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:25,439 It is £270! 601 00:22:25,440 --> 00:22:27,479 Amanda, you're lucky I haven't gone to the police. 602 00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:28,839 You're lucky I haven't called my lawyer. 603 00:22:28,840 --> 00:22:29,919 Do you even have a lawyer? 604 00:22:29,920 --> 00:22:31,239 Yes, I do have a lawyer, Ellie, actually, 605 00:22:31,240 --> 00:22:33,240 and I'm going to call them right now. 606 00:22:40,480 --> 00:22:42,039 Yeah. Hi. It's Amanda Hughes, 607 00:22:42,040 --> 00:22:44,440 and I'd like to speak to my solicitor, please. 608 00:22:45,680 --> 00:22:47,279 They're putting me through. 609 00:22:47,280 --> 00:22:48,559 Last chance, Ellie. 610 00:22:48,560 --> 00:22:49,680 No. 611 00:22:51,200 --> 00:22:53,119 Yeah. Hi. It's Amanda, 612 00:22:53,120 --> 00:22:54,880 and I... PHONE VIBRATES 613 00:22:56,040 --> 00:22:57,719 He got cut off, he's calling me back. 614 00:22:57,720 --> 00:22:59,399 I can see the caller ID. It's your mum. 615 00:22:59,400 --> 00:23:01,199 Yes. 616 00:23:01,200 --> 00:23:02,519 She's my lawyer. 617 00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:04,080 No, she's not. 618 00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:12,079 I can't actually afford to pay you right now. 619 00:23:12,080 --> 00:23:13,560 How are you going to settle this bill, then? 620 00:23:16,400 --> 00:23:19,039 And... action. 621 00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:21,039 Whenever I'm in SoHa, 622 00:23:21,040 --> 00:23:25,839 I like to enjoy a coffee from Vantablack Coffee. 623 00:23:25,840 --> 00:23:27,399 And... cut. 624 00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:28,599 Great. 625 00:23:28,600 --> 00:23:30,239 OK? Yeah. 626 00:23:30,240 --> 00:23:32,839 Right. I'm just going to post this on your Insta, Anne. 627 00:23:32,840 --> 00:23:34,919 Why is there a willy and balls on my coffee? 628 00:23:34,920 --> 00:23:36,159 It's not. 629 00:23:36,160 --> 00:23:37,520 It's a shamrock. 630 00:23:48,760 --> 00:23:50,199 Ah, Ned! 631 00:23:50,200 --> 00:23:52,879 Backgammon? Chess? Cards? 632 00:23:52,880 --> 00:23:54,720 I could make it interesting. 633 00:23:57,760 --> 00:23:59,599 Amanda? Hmm? Play it cool. 634 00:23:59,600 --> 00:24:00,959 Your boyfriend's just walked in. 635 00:24:00,960 --> 00:24:02,160 Where? 636 00:24:03,320 --> 00:24:04,359 ABS LAUGHS 637 00:24:04,360 --> 00:24:05,879 Please don't make light of it, Abigail. 638 00:24:05,880 --> 00:24:07,439 I actually feel quite violated. 639 00:24:07,440 --> 00:24:09,079 Hey, good news! Hi! 640 00:24:09,080 --> 00:24:11,399 The vet's had a look at Bob's bits'n'bobs... Right. 641 00:24:11,400 --> 00:24:13,639 ...and it turns out he was obsessed with his privates 642 00:24:13,640 --> 00:24:15,719 because he needed his glands drained. 643 00:24:15,720 --> 00:24:17,439 So, you are off the hook. 644 00:24:17,440 --> 00:24:20,919 Oh, Mands. I'm sorry Bobby doesn't fancy you. 645 00:24:20,920 --> 00:24:22,639 Yeah, that's great news, 646 00:24:22,640 --> 00:24:25,359 cos frankly, it was gross, so... 647 00:24:25,360 --> 00:24:26,719 I'm glad! THEY LAUGH 648 00:24:26,720 --> 00:24:27,839 Good! Phew! 649 00:24:27,840 --> 00:24:29,479 You OK, Anne? You all right? 650 00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:30,599 Hi. 651 00:24:30,600 --> 00:24:31,679 What's wrong? 652 00:24:31,680 --> 00:24:33,439 I've had no end of grief since that Vantablack post. 653 00:24:33,440 --> 00:24:36,199 Everyone is accusing me of being a Judas and a sell-out. 654 00:24:36,200 --> 00:24:37,239 That's ridiculous. 655 00:24:37,240 --> 00:24:39,239 How do they expect internet artistes to make money? 656 00:24:39,240 --> 00:24:40,639 Look at the comments. 657 00:24:40,640 --> 00:24:42,559 "We came here for plant pot hacks, 658 00:24:42,560 --> 00:24:44,879 "and now she's trying to peddle us expensive coffee". 659 00:24:44,880 --> 00:24:48,399 Well... And apparently I am "all that is wrong with society", Amanda. 660 00:24:48,400 --> 00:24:50,279 Haters gonna hate, Anne. 661 00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:52,599 Y'know? Yeah, well, I don't want to be hated. 662 00:24:52,600 --> 00:24:55,199 So, I've gone back to my hands, my voice, and my pot plants. 663 00:24:55,200 --> 00:24:56,559 OK, Anne. 664 00:24:56,560 --> 00:24:58,599 I should've never have messed with the formula. 665 00:24:58,600 --> 00:24:59,719 Mum! 666 00:24:59,720 --> 00:25:01,039 How could you? What? 667 00:25:01,040 --> 00:25:02,919 After all those talks of online safety, 668 00:25:02,920 --> 00:25:05,199 and you go and flash the entire internet. 669 00:25:05,200 --> 00:25:08,079 What are you talking about? That's just a Christmas cactus. 670 00:25:08,080 --> 00:25:09,119 No, Mum. 671 00:25:09,120 --> 00:25:10,839 Look at the pot! 672 00:25:10,840 --> 00:25:13,119 Hmm? Oh, my God! 673 00:25:13,120 --> 00:25:14,399 See - exactly. 674 00:25:14,400 --> 00:25:16,199 You were worried about some fake bumhole 675 00:25:16,200 --> 00:25:17,879 and now everyone in the world has seen my mum's tits! 676 00:25:17,880 --> 00:25:19,880 FI GASPS Oh, shit. 677 00:25:21,400 --> 00:25:22,879 Symmetrical. 678 00:25:22,880 --> 00:25:24,120 Good for you, Anne. 679 00:25:30,720 --> 00:25:31,839 Yo, Ned. 680 00:25:31,840 --> 00:25:33,399 You all right, Dad? Yeah. 681 00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:34,959 You want to go and hang out in the shed? 682 00:25:34,960 --> 00:25:38,200 I mean, I would, but it's infested with old ladies. 683 00:25:39,640 --> 00:25:43,359 MUFFLED CHATTER 684 00:25:43,360 --> 00:25:45,079 All right - I'll go and have a word. 685 00:25:45,080 --> 00:25:48,239 You know what? I think Felicity needs the shed more than I do. 686 00:25:48,240 --> 00:25:49,360 Yeah. 687 00:25:51,600 --> 00:25:53,559 All right, fine. You can have my room. 688 00:25:53,560 --> 00:25:55,279 Yeah! 689 00:25:55,280 --> 00:25:59,279 Thank you, Dad. I love you so much! Yeah, I love you too. 690 00:25:59,280 --> 00:26:00,879 Cheers! Cheers! Cheers! 691 00:26:00,880 --> 00:26:04,119 Oh, it's so nice to be somewhere where the drinks are actually free. 692 00:26:04,120 --> 00:26:06,919 Mm. Mummy, you know if you're ever lonely, you just have to say. 693 00:26:06,920 --> 00:26:08,759 Why would you ever think I'd be lonely? 694 00:26:08,760 --> 00:26:09,799 SHE LAUGHS 695 00:26:09,800 --> 00:26:10,879 Mm. 696 00:26:10,880 --> 00:26:12,519 Dammit! What's up, Anne? 697 00:26:12,520 --> 00:26:13,599 Oh, God! 698 00:26:13,600 --> 00:26:16,239 They've only gone and cancelled my appearance on Alan Titchmarsh. 699 00:26:16,240 --> 00:26:18,679 Oh, Anne. Yeah. 700 00:26:18,680 --> 00:26:20,599 I wish I'd never gone on that feckin' Insta. 701 00:26:20,600 --> 00:26:22,719 Hey, all publicity's good publicity. 702 00:26:22,720 --> 00:26:24,479 Tell that to Prince Andrew. 703 00:26:24,480 --> 00:26:26,759 Right. Can we all do a selfie? 704 00:26:26,760 --> 00:26:28,319 The Summer House Gang? 705 00:26:28,320 --> 00:26:31,359 Yes! Oh, Mummy! Sweet, yes. 706 00:26:31,360 --> 00:26:33,999 OK, where is it, where is it? OK, just a second. 707 00:26:34,000 --> 00:26:35,119 OK. 708 00:26:35,120 --> 00:26:36,839 Anne, your tit's out again. Oh, God! 709 00:26:36,840 --> 00:26:38,759 I'm joking, Anne! I'm joking. 710 00:26:38,760 --> 00:26:39,999 CAMERA SHUTTER 711 00:26:40,000 --> 00:26:41,159 Ooh! 712 00:26:41,160 --> 00:26:42,559 Oh, look at me! That's fantastic! 713 00:26:42,560 --> 00:26:43,679 I just need some more ice. 714 00:26:43,680 --> 00:26:47,199 Will you watch Bobby for me? Yep. Thanks. 715 00:26:47,200 --> 00:26:48,399 BOBBY WHINES 716 00:26:48,400 --> 00:26:50,479 All right, Bobby? 717 00:26:50,480 --> 00:26:52,279 Ugh! 718 00:26:52,280 --> 00:26:54,120 You little perv. 719 00:26:57,440 --> 00:26:59,080 Still got it.